East Glacier, Finally!

Last weekend Ryan, Eiger and I took a long past-due trip up to East Glacier--it's the longest we've ever been without going up there since we've been together (our Christmas trip was the last time!), and I can hardly explain how wonderful it felt to make the journey north into the mountains that we love so much. We arrived in the dark, and when I woke up on Saturday morning, I felt like a child looking forward to a fun outing--I couldn't sleep so I walked down to Midvale Creek with Eiger. It was a bluebird day and the air was still cool despite the warmth that came later in the day. I found myself actually tearing up as I took in all of the sounds and the intense beauty of the place. Some of that is probably pregnancy, but a big part of it is loving a place so deeply that I almost felt like I was reuniting with a lover after over four and a half months of being apart. I had a profound experience while sitting by Midvale that morning when I realized that our little girl will be the sixth generation of Sherburne's from East Glacier, and that her deep roots somehow draw me even closer to this incredible place. This person that I am growing inside of me, that's part me and part Ryan, is coming into this world with a profound connection to a place, and I am so incredibly happy that she is going to be able to have that experience in life--which has become so unique in the United States--and I am also incredibly grateful that she will bring me even closer to this sacred land.

Ryan and I spent the weekend going to our favorite places--Lake Sherburne and Many Glacier, up to the Jackson Overlook on Going-to-the-Sun, Two Medicine, and the reservoir. We spent time with Grandma Doris, Julie, Cole, Terry, Stephen, Joyce and Bill Jim (friends who are more like family to the Sherburne's and help run the motel every summer), and celebrated Mother's Day with Julie as well. As I mentioned, it was gorgeous all weekend, and being about a month behind the climate of the Missoula and Bitterroot Valleys, we saw leaves and flowers just beginning to open in the short time that we were there. Glacier lilies are just starting to spread across the shaded hills, Pasque flowers are prolific in the meadows, shooting stars are gradually reaching up to their full height and beauty, and cottonwoods and aspens are just now beginning to unfurl their leaves. There are still piles of snow (in places large hills and walls of snow!), and the mountains of Glacier are still blanketed in white. It's definitely early spring there, while here in Lolo there are already flowers that have finished their season's cycle, and the leaves are broad and open--only some of the more shaded cottonwood leaves still have the brown, fragrant sap painted on them. I love the feeling of stepping back in time, getting to experience the thrill of the beginnings of life emerging yet again. It was a lovely weekend.

Hanging out on his namesake-Lake Sherburne

Swiftcurrent

Sunrift Gorge

Milbert's tortoiseshell butterfly

Mount Jackson

A coyote foraging in Cutbank Creek

Glacier lillies

Aspens just opening their leaves

Shooting stars

Ball-headed waterleaf

Cottonwood catkins

A grizzly track on the reservoir road

Mother's Day at Two Medicine

Blossoming

What a gorgeous week it has been. Amazingly, Missoula and Lolo reached the mid-80s yesterday and the day before, bringing the rivers up considerably, the birds out in masses, the leaves out of their buds, and a whole lot of happy people out of the wood works! I have really been counting my blessings lately--we live in such an amazing place, and on these gorgeous spring days I am reminded of how easy it is to take that for granted. Within two days I saw a great blue heron, many osprey, a red tailed hawk, a northern harrier, magpies, mourning doves, meadow larks, robins, chickadees, common mergansers, wood ducks, Canada geese, mallards, house finches, red winged blackbirds, and ravens (I'm sure I'm missing a whole lot, too). Not to mention some of my favorite early spring flowers are bright and blooming: yellow bells, arrow-leaf balsam root, shooting stars, mountain buttercup, and serviceberry. The cottonwoods are opening and releasing their intoxicating scent and the ponderosa pines have the warm, soft aroma of vanilla emanating from them. The Bitterroot is swollen and muddy--powerful in a way that is humbling. I am humbled in so many ways right now--by the spring's overwhelmingly beautiful presence, and of course by the growing life within me who is becoming more and more an obvious presence in my life every day.

Two Canada geese and some very big painted turtles taking a rest on a log in Lolo Pond.

A male wood duck stands just in front of his female mate.

Two male wood ducks.

Catkins on a quaking aspen.

Common mergansers resting on a log across the mighty Bitterroot.

Sappy and fragrant black cottonwood leaves.

As I mentioned in a previous post, the experiences I am having with pregnancy feel so natural to be having in the spring. I feel as if my body and mind are opening and blooming from a tight bud to the expansive place within me where the whole Universe resides, connecting me to everything in nature. The fecundity of spring is almost palpable, and I am recognizing now that I am a natural part of the whole process. Pregnancy has become truly transformative as I've decided to tap into this experience. I can now see and feel the baby rolling across my belly, which has helped me connect to the baby in a more tangible way. And emotionally/spiritually, I am connecting to my Self in a way I never have before. I feel great; strong, connected, and joyful. Most of all, I feel grateful for the way that our little girl has given me so much perspective and a much wider view of the world. It's not easy a lot of the time, but it's truly miraculous. Spring and pregnancy and these experiences I have been having remind me of a beautiful Anais Nin quote: "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." So I dive right into the current of Grace that is spring, that is pregnancy!

At the same time that I have been in wonder of the whole process and feeling more and more engaged in it every day, I have also been incredibly challenged at times! My body image has been turned upside down, but ultimately in a way that I know will be so positive for me, and for our little girl, for the rest of our lives. And of course, I worry a lot. Way too much sometimes. But as my pregnancy progresses, I am learning so much about having faith in my body and mind and heart and my ability to create life, and yoga has so much to do with that growth. Stephanie Snyder is a yoga instructor on Yogaglo that I love, especially her prenatal classes, and in a class I took last night she brought up the yoga sutra 2.46 "sthira sukham asanam," one of my favorite sutras, which translates to a "steady, easy seat." This resonated with me in a way that has really connected this whole process of pregnancy and birth to the practice of yoga and meditation, and the natural and healthy balance of steady and easy, strong and soft. I somehow knew as soon as I was reminded of this sutra that this will be what keeps me in a good and health place through the remainder of my pregnancy and labor. I am so grateful for this practice that has guided me through so much of my life, and especially now as it guides me through the most transformative part of my life so far--bringing another life into this world.

Namaste and thanks for reading!

Spring on Lolo Pond and a Jaunt to Utah

No longer is it just the beginning stages of spring in Lolo--the wood ducks are back, and so are the painted turtles, who I saw yesterday bathing in the sun on the log that lies in the middle of the pond. The pond is even starting to rise in the backyard, beginning the process of the full-on yard flood that usually happens by the end of May. Ospreys have been flying over our yard, and while taking a group of kids birding on Thursday, we saw an osprey fly right over us with a nice sized trout in its talons. And every morning at about 6:00 a.m. I awake to a robin singing loudly right outside of the window that is over our bed. It truly becomes a cacophony of sound this time of year, especially on a sunny day. Spring has hit the mini horses, too, as I came home yesterday to them and their shadow, the goat, in the yard across the street from us. I then spent the next hour chasing them around the neighborhood and up and down the river trail. And I must say, running is not as easy as it used to be now that I'm six months pregnant! With the help of a neighbor, we finally got them in, I fixed the fence (or so I thought), and then I found them this morning doing the exact same thing--they had broken through the fence again, and their hair was left behind as evidence to their determination to push through! This time I had Ryan to help and it didn't take quite as long, but the little rascals are definitely uninterested in humans right now. Ah, spring. I will make sure to get some photos of the beautiful wood ducks and turtles as soon as I can.

In the meantime, I'll share some photos from our recent trip to Southeastern Utah. This is a place that I hold really near and dear to my heart. In 2007, I took a two month backpacking, canoeing, and exploring course with the Wild Rockies Field Institute (www.wrfi.net) all over Southeastern Utah and other parts of the four corners, and I became enamored with the place. There is something holy about the colors--red, blue, and green--so vivid and all in contrast with one another, and the grandiosity of the walls rising in every direction around you; the red canyons against the blue sky, the bright green cottonwoods and gamble oak along the streams in the tall canyons, the bright and descending song of the canyon wren waking me every morning (make sure you listen to the bird's song at this link, it's intoxicating!), and the steadily rising chorus of frogs and toads calling through the night. My heart is pulled back there every year around spring, and every once and a while we get to make the trip. This time, I took a week off from work and Ryan was on spring break, so we drove down to Moab with Eiger and camped and hiked for a few days. It was a long trip for this pregnant lady, but well worth it! Enjoy the photos and have a wonderful weekend:).

Utah penstemon.

Eiger hated the drive, but loved the hikes!

A forest of gamble oak.

Eastern fence lizard.

Spotted towhee foraged near our campsite every morning.

A beautiful cottonwood near the campsite.

A Baby and Lots of Birds-Spring is Here!

This last week was a big week in our lives--we celebrated our halfway point of pregnancy (20 weeks!), and on Thursday of last week we had the big ultrasound! What a trippy--and incredible--experience that was! It felt so good to see our little baby and to hear that everything looks great. And we found out that Baby Sherburne is a girl! It was all extremely exciting. I've had mixed feelings about all of the technology and wondering if it is necessary; since we're going the "natural" route (at a birth center with a midwife), I have been reading all kinds of natural pregnancy books, which often talk down on the ultrasound and question its safety. But I have to say, I am so grateful to have had it. It was an unspeakable joy to see our child, moving around inside of me, all bundled up, and most importantly, healthy. Throughout my pregnancy so far, I have found myself wanting to be one of those women who trusts that everything is fine, doesn't worry, knows that her body is capable of carrying a child, feels a total connection to the baby from day one, and thus feels no need for any technological interventions. I, however, am not. I have worried a lot, wondered why I didn't feel the baby earlier, been scared that I hurt her when I woke up on my back (I really have to wonder if women have always known that they shouldn't sleep on their backs during pregnancy), etc., etc. Point being, it was an incredible relief to see the little girl and hear that things are going well, and I am very grateful that the ultrasound technology is available. And ever since the ultrasound I have worried a lot less. I now am thinking more and more about birth and getting to welcome her into our life! Her due date is coming on fast all of the sudden, the reality of having a child soon is setting in, and Ryan and I could not be more excited.

Here is our beautiful little girl!

The experience of being pregnant during the spring is so unique and beautiful. The smells, sounds, and sensations that indicate that spring has finally arrived feel so much more intense to me this year. I feel almost intoxicated when I step outside and hear a chorus of birds singing. Right now I can hear a robin calling out from the window behind me. It's just joyful, and there's really no other way to describe it. Sitting in our living room today we watched black-capped chickadees, a red-breasted nuthatch, house finches, and dark-eyed juncos feeding on the seed on our deck; flickers, mourning doves, robins, and a pair of Black-billed magpies foraging in our yard; and Canada geese honking loudly and flying in Vs overhead. We saw red-winged blackbirds at my parent's house (another iconic spring bird in this area), and watched a Cooper's hawk cruise casually over our heads as the sun was setting. We have been seeing killdeer at the river, as well as the stunning belted kingfisher and the regal great blue heron.  And today, we saw a flock of about five Mountain bluebirds! No sign of the Eastern bluebirds since the day after my last sighting, but I was thrilled to see the Mountain bluebirds have arrived. The waxy buds on the cottonwoods are slowly starting to swell, and surely the smell that goes along with their blossoming will arrive soon. The black hawthorns are revealing their deep red buds as well. Spring has truly arrived, and even in time for the equinox this year.

Here are some photos from the last week, starting with the Mountain bluebirds we saw today. Enjoy!

Such incredible color in contrast with the still-bare branches of the hawthorn!

The all-blue chest is unique to the Mountain bluebird.

A dark-eyed junco on our deck.

A female house finch.

A gorgeous great blue heron.

Diving for a fish! Patience pays off (for both me and the heron!).

After the dive--you can see the chest feathers puffed out.

O.K., not a bird, but our really adorable cat, Zeppie;)

Eastern Bluebird!

Today on a walk I was just about to turn around when I saw a bird perched on a fencepost. My first thought was "bluebird!", but then I quickly doubted myself. It was chilly and windy at the river and one of those days where, while spring was still on my mind, it felt more like late winter than early spring. Wondering what the bird was, I zoomed in with my camera, and you can probably guess by now what I saw--the striking and brilliant blue wings that flash across meadows all summer, but are especially vibrant on gray days like today, surrounded by dull buff grasses. I was able to get closer for some better photos, and I stood and watched the group of four zipping from the tips of dried mullein flowers to the ends of low, bare branches, to the fence posts nearby. I can't begin to explain the joy I felt by simply seeing and hearing these beautiful Eastern Bluebirds for the first time since last fall. To me, the bluebird has always meant spring, which is one of the reasons I love them so much...the other being obvious; their remarkable beauty. The map on the link above indicates that Eastern Bluebirds don't make it as far as Missoula, and that they don't arrive in Montana until May. I am not sure how long I've been seeing them or even if I saw an Eastern Bluebirds on the Bitterroot last summer (I need to keep a better naturalist journal, apparently!), but I know that I saw some last year, somewhere. I am curious about if this is rare or if this is a changing migration patter, maybe due to climate change or the unusually mild winter we had. Either way, it was such a delight to see!

A male and female Eastern Bluebird.

A male Eastern Bluebird in flight.

Eastern Bluebird males, unlike the more common to Missoula all-blue Mountain Bluebird, has a gorgeous red chest.

A few details about Eastern Bluebirds: they feed primarily on insects and while they naturally nest in cavities made by woodpeckers, they rely heavily on bluebird next boxes, as do the Western and Mountain Bluebirds. The bluebird nest boxes have helped their populations which are threatened by the non-native House Sparrow, who kill and remove bluebird eggs and nestlings from their nests in order to take over the bluebirds' nests. Eastern Bluebirds nest and feed in open fields, prairies, and meadows and are most often seen flying from perches and swooping down to catch insects.

A Northern Flicker, who was perched quietly on the post next to the bluebird, caught in mid-flight.

I hope you are all able to see the newly arrived bluebirds as well! And I'd love to hear about sightings, especially if anyone has seen any Mountain Bluebirds yet. Happy Spring!

Staying

This morning when I took Eiger outside I was absolutely entranced by the amazing songs and calls of all of the recently-invigorated birds surrounding our home. I have been waking up every morning in recent weeks to the clear and beautiful song of the American Robin, and the delightful (non-native) house sparrow (by the way, make sure to listen to the audio on this link of the birds calls of specific species from the Montana Field Guide website--it's what makes this site). In the trees of the house next to ours were the equally sweet calls of house finches, and exploring every inch of the bark just above the finches was a male of one of the smaller woodpeckers, the downy. Across the street the loud and monotonous call of a flicker pulled my attention to the top of an extremely tall cottonwood where it was busily snacking in a well-established cavity. These are all lovely year-round birds that I love, but I'm chomping at the bit to see and hear more of the spring-returnees! I will be going to one of my favorite birding spots, Council Grove, this weekend to see what I can find. I am officially a full-fledged (pun intended) and whole-hearted lover of birds. Nothing brings forth the childlike wonder in me than hearing a familiar call and searching through the trees or bushes or stream side in search of the amazing creature making that call. I am so grateful to live somewhere where I can step outside and experience this kind of life. And I am SO happy it is turning to spring!

Along those lines, Ryan and I are leaning heavily toward staying in Lolo. This whole process of looking at beautiful apartments and condos in town has left me with a feeling that while it would be convenient and "nice," there would be a void in my heart without the closeness of nature we now enjoy. Being pregnant has definitely kicked me into nesting gear, and for a while I thought that meant that I want a nice, new home. Now I'm realizing it really means that I want a sense of security, somewhere I know I am going to feel at home, and a place that makes my heart feel full. We will fix up the trailer we're living in or move into another place close to where we live if something comes up. I am feeling a huge sense of relief at this realization. I am too bound to place to live in suburbia right now.

Enjoy this gorgeous day by getting outside and listening to the birdsong. I'd love to hear about birds that you have seen or heard lately since so many are starting to return to Montana, so please share!

A Gorgeous Sunday

What a day it has been today--it was 60 degrees and there was barely a cloud in the sky all day. We spent the first part of the day looking at new places, which I have very mixed feelings about. I really, really don't want to leave this incredible spot, but I also want to live somewhere where I feel that it will be better, and safer, for a baby. The trailer we live in has been great for us, but it's really old and run down, not secure at all, it's really hard to keep the temperature in the house comfortable, and frankly we would just like a cleaner, well maintained place for the baby! But regardless of what we decide, a big part of my heart is here and it would be very hard to not have the Bitterroot right down the road from us. I'm so grateful that we've been able to live in this incredible location for the last year! I will keep everyone updated on what we decide, but whatever we decide, I won't stop coming to this beautiful place.

I spent the second half of the day walking and birding on the banks of the river. It's hard to even describe what a day like this can do for the psyche after a long, dark winter. I feel invigorated and excited about more days like this to come. The male chickadee are starting to sing their spring song (p.s., this site is great if you're interested in what different chickadee calls and songs mean!). But the persistent repetitive calls of the red-breasted nuthatch and white-breasted nuthatch echoed above the calls and songs of all the other vociferous birds. I have been seeing hairy woodpeckers almost every day now, and today was no exception--these three species were traveling together, as they do in the winter. A true sign from nature that spring isn't quite here. I've also been catching glimpses of one of my all time favorite birds, the belted kingfisher a lot lately. But he moves so quickly I can never catch a photo! One of these days I hope to share with all of you a lovely photo of this particular male.

Another female hairy woodpecker.

A noisy red-breasted nuthatch in mid-call.

After my lovely walk with Eiger we headed to my parent's house to say hello. I spent some time with the horses after a winter of a lot of negligence! They were happy to have my company.

Ali doesn't let her visitors get far from her, while Hope and Gimpy always keep a little bit of distance.

I know it will snow again, and I welcome the snow. But today was such a joy, and a reminder of how much easier a smile is to come by when the sun is shining. I will keep this day in my back pocket as a warm companion for the remainder of the cold days to come.